Dancing in the elevator

I think I have written about dancing before. I realized that I do the majority of my dancing in the elevator. Where I work there is no accessible men's room on the 4th floor. So it is a short ride down to 2. In these brief moments I am able to do a little dancing.

I usually begin before the doors are even fully closed. That's the carefree spirit in me coming out. On a side bar, I like to make funny faces too. As the doors are closing I'll, at the least, stick out my tongue or snarl. This is usually directed at no one. If I'm feeling more surly than normal, I'll even fly the bird, moving my outstretched arm in concert with the door. I think everyone needs to flip something off occasionally or snarl and grunt at imaginary monsters. The same goes with dancing. It is purely coincidence that all of this take place while I am riding the elevator.

So back to the dancing. Since I am limited by time, and space (although some would argue that the elevator has limitless space and that time is only quantifiable because we limit it too in terms of space) my gyrations are rudimentary and hurried. The majority of my dances begin with several fast arm pumps. These could be simultaneously straight out and back or downward, alternating like a robotic jackhammer OR a combination of both. Sometimes I will put both hands behind my head, interlock my fingers and shake head and arms together.

Usually my knees are bent and my feet are stationary.

Now I know white guys get made fun of for not moving their feet when dancing, but remember, this is all taking place in an elevator.

However, my hips do considerably make up for this lack of stepping. I can shake my pelvis in almost all of the 360 degrees available in one plane and arc to nearly 50 degrees in the transverse. The classic 'banana rocker' fore to aft is the standard. Or I do enjoy the 'boat rocker' left to right (similar to what Conan does at the open of his monologue, however, and I mean no disrespect to Mr. O'Brien, I don't need to use imaginary string to make my hips move). These two basic moves can be greatly varied by tempo, frequency, degree and intensity.

All of these variables, randomly assorted as best as I can, keep me entertained for nearly 4 seconds at least twice a day.